Now that we have landed in California, CinS has decided to mix things up a bit by growing some facial hair. He was working on a full beard until I complained, and 2 weeks ago, he picked me up from work wearing the following: baseball cap, metallic aviators, Iron Man Goatee.
Yes, my husband is channeling Tony Stark. And for some reason, he thinks this is an awesome look.
In case you aren't as well-versed in comic facial hair as we are, let me attempt to describe the Iron Man Goatee before you cheat and look down at the provided photo.
The IMG is one part groomed mustache, in the Paul Newman from Road to Perdition style - that is, with space under the nose. This is to maximize efficiency while sneezing.
Next, there is a clear space between the mustache sides and the chin hair. No connector. On the chin, we've got some hyper-sculpted fuzz in the shape of a black widow, with some sweet Puerto Rican hair lines extending outward and upward (but don't connect!) to make it a full goatee.
I have tried to explain to CinS that the IMG does not occur in nature and that Robert Downey Jr. was likely wearing a piece. He does not believe me.
To his credit, CinS did create an almost perfect IMG using nothing more than a $20 razor and good, old-fashioned determination. The IMG lasted about 3 days until we had to go to dinner with friends... in public.
His ultimate goal was to keep the IMG, but move over one misguided PR hair line about 2 inches. This involved growth. And precision. I suggested he create a Stark Stubble to allow him to grow out the critical line hair, while not looking like an unkempt gorilla. The result was palatable.
But then CinS got greedy.
He decided to "clean up" the IMG in some areas other than the chin. Namely, under the nose. Quickly, the IMG went from Tony Stark to Antonio Starnandez. Horrifying.
The moral of the story is this. The lifespan of your average IMG is about 3 days, or until you need to shave. It seems like an impossible task to carve out the perfect IMG in the first place, but once you're there, it's only half the battle. A few short days later, the razor that was once your friend, turns into some giant robot who is really mean and filled with Jeff Bridges. Come on, you know what I mean.
Yes, my husband is channeling Tony Stark. And for some reason, he thinks this is an awesome look.
In case you aren't as well-versed in comic facial hair as we are, let me attempt to describe the Iron Man Goatee before you cheat and look down at the provided photo.
The IMG is one part groomed mustache, in the Paul Newman from Road to Perdition style - that is, with space under the nose. This is to maximize efficiency while sneezing.
Next, there is a clear space between the mustache sides and the chin hair. No connector. On the chin, we've got some hyper-sculpted fuzz in the shape of a black widow, with some sweet Puerto Rican hair lines extending outward and upward (but don't connect!) to make it a full goatee.
I have tried to explain to CinS that the IMG does not occur in nature and that Robert Downey Jr. was likely wearing a piece. He does not believe me.
To his credit, CinS did create an almost perfect IMG using nothing more than a $20 razor and good, old-fashioned determination. The IMG lasted about 3 days until we had to go to dinner with friends... in public.
His ultimate goal was to keep the IMG, but move over one misguided PR hair line about 2 inches. This involved growth. And precision. I suggested he create a Stark Stubble to allow him to grow out the critical line hair, while not looking like an unkempt gorilla. The result was palatable.
But then CinS got greedy.
He decided to "clean up" the IMG in some areas other than the chin. Namely, under the nose. Quickly, the IMG went from Tony Stark to Antonio Starnandez. Horrifying.
The moral of the story is this. The lifespan of your average IMG is about 3 days, or until you need to shave. It seems like an impossible task to carve out the perfect IMG in the first place, but once you're there, it's only half the battle. A few short days later, the razor that was once your friend, turns into some giant robot who is really mean and filled with Jeff Bridges. Come on, you know what I mean.
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