When you hit certain points in your life, you realize that everyone your age is doing X. Sometimes it is something obvious, like how when you turn 16, everyone your age is driving, or when you turn 21, everyone you know is drinking (without a fake ID). (Don’t know what the magic age is for combining the two.) But once you graduate from college, these benchmarks are noticeable, but less obvious. For example, it seems to be generally accepted that when you’re in your late 20’s everyone (or at least a lot of people) you know are getting married (at least in the Northeast – I have a friend who got married in Alabama at age 25 and she was the last of her friends to get married). That probably explains why everyone I know is going to at least 3 weddings this summer. And it’s generally accepted that early 30’s = everyone you know starts having kids. And as one of my older colleagues morbidly pointed out the other day, it seems like late 50’s = everyone you know starts getting cancer or some other lethal affliction.
But here’s one I don’t get. Apparently late 20’s is also the time when everyone you know starts getting involved with charities and hitting you up for money. I recently went to my friends’ charity fundraising party, and also have been hit up for tickets to two other charity events planned by friends. Coincidence, I thought. But one of the more fratastic dudes I know from college just hit me up to sponsor him in a charity AIDS walk. Really? Has it come to this? Is everyone 27 and older now in the charity game?
It’s kind of like high school. The kid you always thought you were smarter than is taking AP Biology, so you gotta take AP Bio. The girl whose parents your parents are friends with plays two sports, so you gotta join the X-Country team. And you find out that the gunner whose applying to the same colleges as you volunteers on Saturdays at an elderly home. Guess what? Two weeks later you’re changing bedpans and getting pwned by old folks at Gin Rummy right alongside him.
So now it’s charity. New York City underprivileged youth. Systic Fibrosis. Diabetes. AIDS. Super AIDS. There’s a charity for each of these causes, and apparently everyone I went to college or high school with is running them.
I guess I’ll join one, since everyone else is doing it. Hell, maybe I’ll start one. A charity that allows kids the “opportunity” to come over to my house and play Grand Theft Auto or Rock Band with me while appreciating the glow a fresh neon sign while wearing the hottest new replica soccer jerseys eBay has to offer.
Now that’s a cause I can get behind.
1 comment:
Well said. Just like the AP classes, triple sports teams, and the "entrepeneur club" (Risky Business reference?) of high school, this charity obsession is in some cases just a ploy to build up all our resumes and make us more fit for leading corporate america. instead of applying to colleges we're bolstering our bios... "so and so has been frequently invovled in spearheading philanthropic activities for leading charitable organizations in the NYC metro area." the powers that be want to see this kind of well-roundedness in its future leaders.
corporate philanthropy is kind of like dating-- some dude's bank helps your company with a transaction, in exchange your company makes his bank buy a $10K table at your huge fundraising gala to support a polio vaccine charity. not too disimilar from 24 year old girl who can't pay her rent getting a free meal from a short dude, in exchange for a little nookin' afterwards.
though i guess its not the worst thing in the world if both parties get what they want, and the charity benefits... is that the meaning of altruism?
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