Guest Star

Our friend Eric has been salivating over this blog since its inception one month ago, and has repeatedly asked for a user name so he could post. Not being a legal Blogtari, I had to decline. But seeing as he practically lives in our apartment and spends his non-apartment time with my husband anyway, I guess he's an honorary member of the family.

Eric also deserves mucho propos for his determination to be published. Eric posted a comment to one of our Blogtari posts that is less of a comment and more of a stand-alone post. It's got all the grammatical prowess of a classic Blogtari post, and so I must share it with you all.

Thank you Eric for your readership, your spell check, your dedication to Facebook, your way with the ladies, and most importantly, thank you for making today's post so effortless. I really didn't have much time anyway.

Facebook Rebuttal - by Eric Blogtari

I just had a moment of online clarity. I have 202 friends on facebook and I've been checking out this new hip Facebook chat feature.

So, the last three times I've logged onto facebook, I have clicked the chat button to see who of my friends were available to converse with me. Was thinking of opening a few conversations with something to the effect of, "hey isn't this new chat thing cool, we are such pioneers." Sadly, however, at no point during these three occasions was anyone online who I had the slightest desire to converse with.

I think this must be a testament to the current state of being for social networking in which we have hundreds of friends from all points of life (including ex's, that random
guy you met that time at that networking event and were too nice to click "decline," and in some cases people you really don't know but thought there was a chance you were just being forgetful so you hit "accept" and then later realized you were right and don't know the person at all).

This is the equivalent of having 1,000 channels and 50 Ondemand channels and yet there is nothing on, except different, you know, because its actual people you're supposed to be friends with. Anyway, since I know no one is listening, I'm gonna go accept that latest request-- 203 friends may change everything.

No Facebook, I Do NOT Know Rachel Rosenbloom Goldfarb!

I love Facebook. I am on it every single day from 30 to 120 minutes, depending on my mood. It's quite pathetically awesome of me.

One of my favorite Facebook features is the "People You May Know" section of my home page. In my early days of Facebook (all of one month ago), I discovered many people I actually knew and have since befriended. Thank you Facebook. I can now stalk all sorts of folks I never would have thought to seek out on my own. And isn't stalking always more fun when it's someone you don't see everyday?

But these days, my social network seems to be tapped out. Faceboook is incessantly recommending the same 10 people. None of whom I have heard of before.

But there does seem to be a pattern here. All of these "people I may know" have the most ridiculous Jewish names ever. It's a little crazy. I know that I am a Jew who lives in New York and went to a predominantly Jewish college and joined a 99% populated Jewish sorority, but COME ON! I have a Muslim husband for G-d's sake! I lived with a Chinese chick! My co-workers live in Texas and shoot things! Throw me a bone here Facebook.

I think this is a sign from Moses. I either need to A) lead some kind of youth group in my spare time instead of Facebooking, or B) make some new friends ASAP. I think I'm gonna spend the weekend eating ham and cheese at a singles bar.